Heartbreak is Part of Business

Dec 15

Heartbreak is part of life, and business

Clients come and go. That’s the way of business.

 My M. O. is to not get too attached any of my clients, because when they go as the eventually must, my heart often breaks.

 Frequently (okay, very frequently), however, I do get attached.

 It makes sense that I would grow to love my clients since I’m a coach, and in the coaching relationship we end up talking about things that really matter.

But this heartbreak deal isn’t new for me. I felt like this in my previous businesses too.

 Last week, I was talking to my own coach about loving people (and clients), and how hard that is if you’re constantly trying to manage future heartbreak. This is like having one foot on the gas, and another on the brake.

 She asked: “What if you took your foot off the brake?”

 I was telling her about the pilot group I started in October called The Journey of the Small Business Warrior.

I’m starting another group in January with five more people, and I’ve been talking with potential participants about what they can expect to go out of the experience. 

 What I haven’t told these people about the Journey is that they’ll be seen. Acknowledged. Championed. And possibly loved.

 I’m cautiously taking my foot off the brake of car. Not just in work, but in the rest of my life too. Heartbreak happens. I think it’s delusional to think it can be managed.

 How about you? Do you love your clients? Or are you too scared to? Are you trying to manage your heartbreak? Is it working? I invite your comments below.

 

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2 comments

  1. As a communication coach, trainer, and mediator, I so relate to your comments about heartbreak. I feel great compassion for the struggles of my clients and students. I want to wrap them up in love and shield them from all pain from their pasts and out in the world. What helps me is to love and support them, speak the hard truths gently to them, be a channel as much as I can for greater wisdom, remind them of how we all make mistakes or have disappointments, and let go of their outcomes. My work is all about helping people get the skills and perspectives that will empower them, so I remind myself of that.

  2. There is a proverb in Chinese that says that “there is no party that never ends”. Every partnership / relationship / friendship will part one day, even if it is in the event of death. I was scared to death when I met my husband thinking that we might break up or he might leave me. But he was fearless, he was not concerned about being hurt.

    Sometimes there are thing in life you are unsatisfied about. Being a perfectionist yourself, I am sure this is a constant struggle for you. This may be especially difficult when it involves other people in your life. When you love people, you can’t help to have some expectations. After all, we are only human.

    I remember the time when we said we would stop coaching with you, the time was right to stop but I found myself crying after wards. Then again, if you subscribe to the new age believe that we all come from the same place and all souls are interconnected and we will all return to the same place (they call this the “source”) then the parting is only temporary. So, while the Chinese may say that there is no party that never ends, the real truth is that we never parted in the first place.

    Speaking of partying ways, I think we still have one coaching session left. We were going to coach on May 7th of this year I think and we never made it to the appointment due the upheaval that was happening to our lives and we never quite rescheduled.

    I think it would benefit me to start coaching again. I would like to start another business :D

    See? When one party ends, another party begins.

    Love,

    May

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